Igor! Bring on the first song!"
"Yessss, Masssssteeerrr."
- Bobby Pickett — Monster Mash
"An excellent choice, Igor. For tonight is night when the zombies walk, vampyres stalk the night, and dead men lose their bones. Bwaaaahaahaha!"
- Sophie Ellis-Bextor — Mixed Up World
"Hmm, Igor. This is not quite as Hallowe'en-themed as the previous one."
"Ssssorry, Massster, but all the other sssssongssss were ssssoundtracksss."
"Never mind. I will punish you later. And don't say any more words with an 's' in them. It's quite annoying."
"Yessssss, Massssterr."
"Sigh. Anyway, readers. You will fear the oddly-rhombus shaped one. Oh yes. Fear! Fear! Hmm, what's this Igor? A message from the Narrator? That I should read out? Who says he's in charge of me? I bow to no-one! For I am—"
A huge anvil hangs suspended in mid-air above the good Doctor's head.
"Oh, very well. 'This song is for everybody who's been having a bad week, and I hope things are looking up somewhat'. Namby-pamby sentiment! There will be no room for that in our glorious new order, will there, Igor?"
"No, sssssirrrrr."
The anvil disappears, but the Narrator reminds the good Doctor that he is the omniscient one in this tale, so the Doctor had better watch his back.
- Electrelane — I'm On Fire
"Ah, self-immolation. Perhaps something you should try one day, Igor. But not today, for before this night is out, our undead creation shall haunt the land once more!
- Elliott Smith — Baby Britain
"Is it ready, Igor? Is it ready?"
"Yessss, massssterrrr. The piecessss are in place."
"Very well. Let us begin. I give you a man, and the man was lost. I give you a hair from the 1922 committee, and a speck of blue rinse. I give you an answer, but not to your question. I give you a clause, and its number is twenty-eight. Come to us now, I call upon you. I call. I call. I. I. I."
- Björk — Immature
"It's alive! IGOR! IT'S ALIVE! I HAVE CREATED NEW LIFE!"
"It'sssss beautiful, massster. What will you call it?"
"An undead terror that will strike fear into the hearts of people, before being quietly buried in just over a year's time? Nice to meet you, Mr. Howard. Nice to meet you."