Girl VII

Or Is It The Businessman, In His Suit or Tie?

SOTCAA trace the history of ‘Del Boy Falling Through The Bar’ in their own thorough and unique manner.

(warning: contains bitterness. Though often well-placed. Not quite sure what TJ and Unruly Butler/Gralefrit did to make them enemies, mind you)

The depressing thing is that I remember a lot of those threads from the first time around…

EDIT: Why the North, Stew? Why the North?

It's Only Springtime

I am obsessed with fizzy cola bottles. It’s a childhood thing, I guess; that trip down to the shop every Saturday morning to get Transformers for 32p, and the rest of the 50p being spent on sweets. Eighteen cola bottles, each so sour that you’d screw your face up in all sorts of contortions on every bite.

The newsagents that I used to village is now a horrible little Tesco Local that somehow manages to have half the things that Jay Kays used to and still feel cramped (I’m guessing growing up has a part in this, but I think that remodelling has indeed made the place much smaller), and cola bottles have never really tasted the same since some point in my teens.

Since I’ve started making sweets and chocolates last year, I’ve had a few attempts at making gelatin gummies, but they’ve all been complete failures, except for an odd batch of blue raspberry strips that I made almost by accident last Easter. So, time to try again.

Normally, you’d add the flavouring just before you pour the gelatin into the molds, using a concentrated flavour compound. This time, however, I decided I’d bloom the gelatin in the flavour I wanted (I used blackcurrant syrup - perhaps cola next time). This way opens up the idea of using any flavoured liquid you have to hand - fairly useful, perhaps. Anyway, these seem to have turned out quite well, leading me to think that I could embark on a pectin version soon (I’d prefer to have a vegetarian-friendly version if possible).

Blackcurrant Gummy Bottles

I’m also toying around with texture in chocolates at the moment. I want things to be crunchier. I had a go with ground cornflakes a couple of weeks back, which worked fairly well, but after coming across Michael Laiskonis’s playing around with caramelized rice, I thought I’d make an All-Caramel version - rice and white chocolate turned wonderfully brown and tasty…

Caramel Crunch

Next week: I may begin the Giant Creme Egg madness. Be afraid.

Really, This Is What Channel 4 Has Come To? (The Rappers, You've Seen Them)

From Chortle:

‘The danger of taking risks in comedy is that you get slagged off disproportionately. If it launched today, The 11 O’Clock Show would be strangled at birth by embittered comedy bloggers.’

Oh, for a time machine. If we could have started Blogger just a few years earlier, we would have been spared so much…

If We Steal Enough Ideas From The Tories, Maybe We'll Look Better

Justice Secretary Jack Straw has said the government's planned Bill of Rights will define the UK's "common values".

He said it was not certain whether these responsibilities would be legally enforced.

Well, you’re only the one writing the Bill…

Ignored. Of Course.

Mr Johnson said: "St George's Day has been ignored in London for far too long, but I'm truly pleased to announce some fantastic events to mark this occasion. We have much to be proud of in this great country; England has given so much to the world politically, socially and artistically.

Five minutes of searching later:

2008:

For 2008 English Food was the central theme for the Trafalgar Square event, where the world famous Borough Market relocated for the day. In addition, the popular annual Shakespeare’s Birthday celebrations at the Globe took place as well as the Festival of St George at Covent Garden and parade at the Cenotaph.

2007:

Trafalgar Square will host a free programme of classic film and television comedy on Monday 23 April, as part of the Mayor of London’s St George’s Day celebrations, which will culminate in a special screening of Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and a ‘coconut orchestra’ world record attempt involving cast members of West End hit, Monty Python’s SPAMALOT.

2005:

Thousand of Londoners and visitors to the capital were able to mark St George’s Day on Saturday 23 April with a range of events, including four supported by the Mayor of London. For the second year running, there was a celebration of Shakespeare’s contribution to English literature at the Globe Theatre. More than 9,000 people enjoyed a variety of activities, including the chance to read the Bard’s lines from the world famous stage.

Jon Stewart Killed My Career And All I Got Was A Dance-Off!

Tucker Carlson: Refreshingly, Still A Dick!

Apple: ZERO BUTTONS AHOY!

It’s like iPod Zen…

Britain: 1983: NO FUTURE.

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Britain: 1980: NO FUTURE.

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