3-2

Just as expected.

We now return you to your local AOLTimeFOXVerizonHearstClearChannel programme.

currently playing: The Clash - Every Little Bit Hurts

Look! Now With Added Recipes!

Just to show that it’s not all doom and gloom, and that sometimes the big companies don’t get everything their way: the Austin branch of the EFF has managed to defeat the Texan version of the Super-DMCA Bill, sending the MPAA back home. A small victory which doesn’t help the residents of, say, Florida or Michigan, but it’s a start.

"We have 200 couches where you can sleep tight"

Interpol must have a big house. Must be expensive, considering NYC estate prices.

It's just occurred to me that despite spending a year in America, I neglected to pass on the secret of the KitKat straws to the New World. This is obviously a tragedy which must be rectified at the earliest opportunity. Like now:

KitKat Straws.

What You'll Need:

A KitKat (chunky works best, but in a pinch the old 4-blocks are good)

Tea/Coffee/Hot Chocolate

Instructions: Take the KitKat and bite both ends off. Place one end in the cup, and suck the drink through the other end. Delicious goodness. But don't suck for too long, or else the KitKat will melt and fall into your drink. This Is A Bad Thing.

What? Why is everybody looking at me like that?

currently playing: Kenickie - Hooray For Everything

The Worst Books Ever!

Sir Ian McKellen: Actor

The Book of Leviticus

It's full of old legal nonsense that some people still take seriously.

John Peel: DJ and radio presenter

Managing my Life: My autobiography by Alex Ferguson

I'm a Liverpool supporter.

currently playing: Radiohead - There There

Why I Hate Disney Today

Finding Nemo is out this weekend in America. The UK release date? October. Grr. By that time, they’ll have already released the DVD. I suppose it could be worse; it’s coming out on Boxing Day in Iceland. I know, I know, it’s timed to coincide with the October half-term, but couldn’t they put it out in the summer? Just this once?

Well, that was May. Rather quick, wasn't it?

currently playing: Godspeed You Black Emperor - BBF3

FCC And You

On June 2nd, the FCC is expected to relax the American laws restricting companies from owning too much of the media. The current regulations state that that no company can own more than 35% of the US television market. After Monday, that will rise to 45% under the proposed new rules. TV Stations will also no longer be barred from owning newspapers in their local markets.

The legacy of the 1996 radio deregulation, which resulted in Clear Channel owning 1,200 of America's radio stations (now becoming increasingly centralised and providing less local programming) has given rise to serious opposition to the suggested changes. Internet campaigns, members of Congress, the National Rifle Association, and even some media barons have all expressed their concerns.

The FCC believes that the Internet will prevent America from becoming a media monoculture, so consolidation of TV and print channels shouldn't have too much of an impact. Leaving aside a recent study that indicates that as much as half of the population of the USA is not interested in going online, this idea is flawed. The companies that own the Internet connections, for example RoadRunner, are intimately connected with the media empires (RoadRunner is part of AOL/TimeWarner). How is the Internet supposed to be the saviour of the media when the media empires own the communications links, as well as the TV stations and newspapers? How can new companies emerge when the Baby Bells aren't forced to share the fibre connections?

This is the point where we British can get smug, and say "well, that'd never happen here." Possibly not to the same extent, no, but worrying developments are just over the horizon. The Government is currently pursuing a new Communications Bill which would relax foreign ownership and overall percentage restrictions from the UK. ClearChannel has already expressed an interest about buying several UK radio stations after the Bill becomes law. I give you Lowry Mays, head of Clear Channel:

If anyone said we were in the radio business, it wouldn't be someone from our company. We're not in the business of providing news and information. We're not in the business of providing well-researched music. We're simply in the business of selling our customers' products.

Not exactly Reithian, is it?

currently playing: Idlewild - Live In A Hiding Place

This Really Is A One-Line Entry

Honest. Busy, busy, busy.

currently playing: Kenickie - Stay In The Sun

Sky Is Blue

Typical. Britain finally decides that, after a month of solid rain, it might be an idea to have some sunny weather, and I’ve been stuck in the house working on Top Secret Project #1. Happily, it seems to be going well, so I might be able to move outside tomorrow.

While I was away, my family finally caved and bought a Sky satellite dish. My sister controls the TV with an iron fist, hopping through the fifty or so music channels with deft efficiency, only pausing for the Bhangra station and the inevitable Justin Timberlake music videos. Everybody else has now gone to bed, so I've just had a quick look around. For all those who think of Britain as the last bastion of quality TV programming, I give you FriendlyTV. The current programme? Three girls getting drunk and responding to text messages being sent to them by people who also seem to have had a few. It's not exactly Edge of Darkness. So what am I doing watching it? Er, that's a very good point; let's move on.

Okay, RaptureTV seems to be exactly the same, except instead the girls have been replaced by a rave soundtrack. Skipping through the Movies and Sport sections (we only have Sky Prole), and into the news channels. Which blend into one after a while. Except for FOX News, of course. I can only watch it for about five minutes before I want to start throwing things. Today, it was a smug, self-satisfied item on Amnesty International's annual report. I have no objections with them criticising Amnesty; what I have a problem with is their attempt to discredit the report by effectively saying "Saddam's gone. Isn't the world better? Surely you don't support Saddam's Evil Regime, do you? I bet you liked Hitler." If the report has flaws, tell us about them. In a non-hysterical manner, preferably.

Cartoons! Excellent. The world is better for the existence of the Cartoon Network (Roadrunner marathons!). But I'm trying to discover new things, so I'll press on.

Oh. Approximately 175,324 teleshopping channels. Most of which seem to run American infomercials.

Actually, I think I'll go to bed and read a book.

currently playing: The Sundays - Wild Horses

This Could Be A Busy Week

Also, this is one of those one-line entries that only exists so I can say that I wrote something for every day in May. Which is rather sad, I suppose. Hopefully, I will have something to write about in the next few days. But not at the moment, so I’ll go to bed. And yes, it ended up being a little more than one line.

currently playing: Radiohead - Go To Sleep. Hah. See? My computer is sending me subliminal messages…

Safari Ate My Comments

Bah. Anyway, just to make this clear — I don’t want anybody to think that I thought the UK was unfairly treated in Eurovision; it was an abysmal performance, and we deserved what we got.

The Ireland thing: I promise I didn't lift it from Father Ted. However, a brief search through the Internet reveals nothing apart from references to reports that RTE wanted the rules changed so that all the countries shared in the staging costs rather than the winner having to bear all the burden, which might be seen as evidence that they were struggling a little. Mind you, I also found several messages from Irish USENET posters complaining that RTE was using the contest as an excuse to get more funding from the Government. So, er, yes, "throwing" it was a bit strong: "extremely pleased to lose" probably describes it better.

This has been a Bank Holiday Corrections Update.

currently playing: Transvision Vamp - Baby I Don’t Care

Two Weeks

Invade France!

currently playing: The Chemical Brothers - Let Forever Be